It’s funny how this time of year can be quite taxing. A holiday is tucked in at the end of November that implores us to be thankful for what we have, cultivated by childhood visions of pilgrims and Native Americans lovingly breaking bread—a reminder that there are more common qualities that unite us rather than divide.
We learn as we get older that it’s a tissue of lies, and perhaps we take comfort in that notion when we argue about who’s doing the cooking, the hosting, bringing extra chairs, etc. We’ve spent a lifetime romanticizing the good ol’ days, when in fact some days were better than others, and many others have been whitewashed to conform to our narrative.
Even when we have done our best to live up to the ideals of the holiday, we flush it all away by getting in line at Best Buy, just before midnight, to take advantage of the Black Friday deals. Great for retailers and good for the economy, but sadly ironic to be grubbing for cheaper goods a day after being thankful for what we already have. I’ve been guilty of snapping up a 4K telly from Sharp that was marked down several hundred, so consider the source.
Maybe I missed the point and shouldn’t play the role of Donnie Downer. I’ll spare you the Charlie Brown cry of “Doesn’t anyone know the true meaning of Thanksgiving?” For all of us who beat ourselves up for not being the best person we can be, there are many others who are succeeding in that quest.
Bright Lights
I had exactly that opportunity last month when Raj Thadani of Mars International invited me to attend The Jillian Fund Gala in Garfield, New Jersey, with the bright lights of New York City resonating in the background. It was held in The Venetian, an expansive and awe-inspiring space befitting banquets, benefits and weddings. And on this night, hundreds of people from every walk of our industry had the opportunity to get dressed up, mingle, play casino games and even stroll through a haunted house. It was a who’s who of industry heavyweights.
The intent of the Gala was to thank all of its supporters and raise more money to help back financially-strapped families who have to put their regular lives on hold in order to spend what could be the final days and weeks of a gravely ill child’s life at their side. The Gala itself helped bring in $470,000 in its ongoing quest to ease the burden of tragedy-struck families; to date, more than $2 million has been raised.
If you’re reading this, then you’re quite familiar with the story of Jillian Gorman, daughter of Ricoh veteran George Gorman. She battled acute myeloid leukemia, a rare cancer of the blood and bone marrow, for more than three years, having endured three bone marrow transplants and a kidney transplant as well as chemotherapy. She passed away in 2013, and her father joined forces with Bill McLaughlin and other caring members of the industry—of which there are many—to create this legacy and testament to the love and desire to help others that Jillian herself inspired.
While I never had the privilege of meeting Jillian, her father was more than generous in sparing five minutes to talk about one thing we have in common—the love for our children. Even before we shook hands, I knew intuitively that he was a better man than I. Anyone who can simultaneously reconcile the loss of his baby girl and step outside of his own shattered world to create such a loving testament to her that benefits others, ranks that individual somewhere near the realm of saint. Yes, Jillian was a young woman at the time of her passing, but the term “baby girl” is never shed, as any father would attest, regardless of her age.
Strength and Inspiration
“I believe my daughter is looking over us and giving us all the encouragement and inspiration that we need to put something like this together,” Gorman said as he gazed out across the smiling faces in The Venetian. “The biggest motivation, for me, is what would my children want, and what would they be proud of…which way would they want me to go?
“But I get my encouragement from thinking about my daughter, how she lived her life, how she constantly thought to help families and others in need,” he added. “When she was in the hospital, many times—after three bone marrow transplants, a kidney transplant and some powerful side effects—people would write and call her. She would return their letters and offer words of encouragement for their own struggles, whether it’d be over something very serious like a disease, or something as simple as passing an exam or getting through a marathon. I get my encouragement from her by example.”
In a sense, while medical technology could not extend Jillian’s life, her father decided that he would extend the way she lived, and wanted to live, her life by emulating his baby girl’s caring spirit. The spirit lives on because George Gorman chose to go down “one of two roads,” as he put it. He didn’t mention what the other road entailed…it wasn’t necessary.
I stood at the kitchen island with my baby girl the other day as she opened the financial aid award sent by her No. 1 college of choice. We hashed through what it would take to be able to make the finances work for her education, her ability to play four years of collegiate softball, the chance to become an elementary education teacher upon graduating. A lifetime of experiences awaits her, as does the opportunity to make a difference in the lives of others. At that moment, looking at her smiling face after telling her “we’ll figure it out,” I felt truly thankful.
And then I thought of Jillian. And George. For all of the bright stars that burn out far too early, the ones that remain are forced to shine a little more than usual, regardless of their ability or desire. And George Gorman has it in him to pick up the torch.
The Unimaginable
It’s a loss I cannot conceive. And on that night, selfishly, I had to ask George Gorman. How…
“I don’t know how you get through something like this without, No. 1, believing there’s a life after, and your faith,” he said. “The other one is having this level of support. I have personal and business relationships with some great people, like Mike Stramaglio, Bill McLaughlin, Larry Weiss and Jerry Blaine, who have really been supportive along with their companies.
“I know what I’m going through and where I’ve come from, by trying in some small way to contribute to the well-being of others. I know that’s what Jillian would want as well.”
From our family to yours, we wish you a Happy Thanksgiving!
